Two-Sentence Movie Reviews

To Live And Die In LA

Standard cop's-partner-gets-shot-cop-goes-after-killer film weighed down by a completely unlikable protagonist (when one's audience cheers whenever the "hero" is beat up, one has failed in one's characterization, unless the director in question really wanted to base his film around an uninteresting unhinged asshole with delusions of power), other players who sneer their way through lines, such as they are (I've never seen so many cliches in already terrible dialogue; they must have been levering them in with a can of bear grease and a shoehorn), confused attempts at swearing (after the fifth mangled reference to asses, coupled with the many shots of asses in the film, I started to wonder if we were getting a look into someone's brain) and a very early example of MTV editing, you have a load of pretentious coke-fueled wanking that isn't even saved by the Wang Chung soundtrack. Over-hyped bollocks, great for the ADD'ing under 20 set- everyone else please avoid, unless you feel like doing some serious MST-ing.